Skip to main content

My Life. My Vision. My Happiness.

What do I want to be?
Who am I?
Why do I feel the way I feel?
How in the world...?

Months before we even sounded our first cry, people and society have already waged their expectations.
Some might even say that even before we are conceived, our destiny has already been predetermined.


Do we live our lives because someone dictates who we are supposed to be?

Or no matter how we resist, the person we are to be -- eventually emerge?

Is our happiness dependent on what society dictates happiness means?

Do you even know what it is that makes you happy?

A lot has happened in my nearly 49 years. And looking back, I was mostly happy -- well, scratch that, I was generally happy.

I am not one to have a bucket list because there's only one thing that motivates my day-to-day, and that is to live a happy simple life .

But what happy and simple to me may not be happy and simple for others.

Acceptance. It took almost 5 decades for me to accept what I want to be -- and what I am meant to be. Yes, there are moments that my mind plays that "If only I were ..." way of thinking. But once I accept that there are limits to what I can possibly do or be, my day to day becomes happy and simple.

Gratitude. Yes, there is always something to be thankful for. If everyday I remind myself of the few things I am thankful for, the little detours that I might encounter in that day won't feel like a disappointment but just the way of life. I learn to believe that if we are thankful for who we are and what we have, we'll end up being happier and having so much more. If we focus our energy on who we aren't and what we don't have, then we'll end up being grumpy and left feeling depleted, never ever having enough.

Choice. Life is simpler when we are not attached to things. When I do things without expectations, for some reason, things get done. When my choices are concentrated on the end-result, the level  of stress is beyond acceptable. However, when I chose to do a task and focus on the task itself without any preconceived notion of what the by product is - surprisingly the end result is pure happiness.

Love. Such a powerful feeling. To love God and love others -- that's the golden rule, right? Wrong! I learned that we have to learn how to love our own self before we can even think of truly loving God or loving others. If I can't truly appreciate who I am or if I don't love who I am and who I can be -- how can I express true love?

Truth. "To thy own self be true." I keep saying that since I started my journey to find myself -- sometime 40 years ago. And yet, every time my youngest child hear me say those words, he laughs because he can't even imagine what it's like not to be true to one's self.

Sigmund Freud introduced me to the 3 parts of our psyche: Id, Ego and Superego - instinct, reality and conscience. But what I learned is that sometimes we attach artificial definitions to "What works" and "what doesn't" , definitions that have nothing to  do with "what's really so."

I started accepting the truth of who I was, who I am and who I can be. And because of that, I look forward to living a happy, simple life.
This morning was one of those beautiful snowy days in March -- a day to be thankful for. After not having the time to actually enjoy and see the outside world, choosing to zenwalk this morning with my friend was one of this month's simple pleasures.



Popular posts from this blog

Completed my first 16 Week IsaBody Challenge: Believe You Have A Purpose

My family is what matters most to me.  I’m 51 and a mother of 4 (ages 14 – 26). I wanted to be healthier, more active and stronger not just for me, but for the people I love.  I wanted to set an example for my family that we each possess the tools to master our wellness and vitality. I've always been petite except when I was pregnant ( when I gained an average of 50 pounds per pregnancy - 4 times!) Over the years I had tried various diet and exercise regimens, and I did enjoy a degree of success, but the results were not to the level I hoped for, and they were somewhat short lived.   Achieving stable, long-lasting results proved stubbornly elusive.    Then when I hit menopause everything became more difficult.    My body stopped cooperating altogether, and I was constantly grumpy. My waist and hips expanded and I found myself napping in the afternoons.    I started to accept the idea that there would be this new, less vibrant version of me. I just completed my P

Immigration and Family: Will my mom ever get to see my daughter walk down the aisle

Last year when my father passed away in the Philippines, I went home and took some time to visit the U.S. Embassy in Manila to ask what the options are for my mother to return to the U.S. The consul reminded me of the 10-year travel ban. That on or after November 8, 2015 — not earlier – or 10 years after my mom, was deported in 2005 for overstaying her visa, I can email the U.S. Embassy and inquire about my mother’s approved petition. I asked if I need to file another petition, and she informed me I didn’t have to. I asked if I could… and she stopped me and said to ask everything on or after November 8, 2015. This is where I am, and where my thoughts are drifting as I celebrate this month my 16th American birthday. I am counting the months, the weeks and the days. My daughter is getting married in January 2016 and I would love to have my entire family, especially my mother, to be here when that momentous occasion happens.

SPICE-up a young child's development: social, physical, intellectual, creative and emotional

Children are the precious gems of a family. When they’re young and innocent, they are like sponges that willingly and quickly absorb any knowledge and emotion. That’s why at an early age, we encourage our children to read, be creative, be happy and feed their curiosity. With all the technology and instant gratification that children get from playing video or computer games, asking a child to read a good book has been a challenge for some parents .     “Your children are not your children.       They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.       They come through you but not from you,       And though they are with you, and yet they belong not to you.       You may give them your love but not your thoughts,        For they have their own thoughts.        You may house their bodies but not their souls,        For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,        which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.” -                     Kahlil Gibr

Helping others surpass their goals and expectations

"It's not about the end goal. It's who you become by consistently pushing to the edge of your limits." - Robin Sharma Do you ever wonder why you stumble on new things?  Do you ever wonder why unsuspecting strangers cross your path? Do you ever wonder why your mind takes you to a direction you didn't think exist? I was walking to StarBucks to meet my husband when I noticed a sign...

Still shaky, skidded in snow, but so blessed my guardian angels are looking after me!

"Never again wonder, what to be thankful for..."   - Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life It’s yet another snowy day in New Jersey. Beautiful, yes but dangerous! In line with my goal for this month is to get back on schedule. I got up around 4am to get my 15yo ready for his Model United Nations conference. (Thankful that our neighbor offered to drive him to school by 5:30am ) I got my 9yo ready for school and I'm thankful that my other neighbor offered to drive him to school. I then drove my husband to the train station to Manhattan. I decided to stop by the Community Center and decided to run a fast 5K on the treadmill. I was 1 mile short because I was so sweaty and hot. (Note to self: dress lightly next time) While cooling down inside the car, I read Day 14’s chapter of Rick Warren's the “Purpose Driven Life” book. I felt really good because it just reminded me that there is always something to be thankful for no matter how awful yo