“Mom, is heaven safe? I am scared of dying”

Friday, February 27, 2009

Dec 10, 2006 – that’s when my youngest experienced someone he knew and loved died.

I remember him asking, “Mom, can I go and visit heaven just to see if Trixie’s okay?”He was just barely 6 years old.

And then a few days ago, he asked me, “Mom, is heaven safe? I am scared of dying.”
How do you explain such sorrow. How do you ease his pain and fear?

Ten years ago, when my aunt passed away, my husband wrote the a note because I was crying so much.

“For Mommy : Why do people cry when people die

Because they have tears in their eye.
Because together they can never again look at the sky.
Because they will not go to McDonalds and eat pie or French fries.
Because they didn’t get to say good-bye.
And they will never again hear the sigh.

OR ( in an attempt to make me laugh)

They can never go to the store to buy the tie
Or tell them to close their fly.

I didn’t immediately realize that children are heavily affected by a death of a loved one.
They may not show the pain and sorrow through their facial expressions because they didn’t want their mother to worry about them. However, the kids were anxious, worried, upset, in denial and felt cheated. Having them to talk to someone earlier on would have helped them cope with the loss.

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